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Laura's Links
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A Story About Having a Bug.
6/30/07
I'm sick. Undenyably sick. I'm not sure whether I've picked up a bug, have food
poisoning from the jar of Corn Salsa that I ate yesterday, have fallen victim
to Lucy's (teacher at my nutrition class) assignment this week of adding more fiber to
our diets, or am starting a new flare of my Crohn's Disease. Bottom line is, though,
that I've dropped three pounds since this morning's weigh-in.
Debbie C., my dear friend from West Virginia, called this evening. I normally won't
admit when I'm sick, at least until I cannot hide the symptoms, but I felt like complaining
to somebody and she was available. (Thank you, Debbie!) Anyway, we couldn't
stick with the pity party very long, so I told her the story of when I had a "different"
sort of bug.
Since I've not taken any new pictures and don't under any circumstances, have the
energy to download and downsize them anyway, Debbie suggested that I post the story
here in my blog. That's an easy task since I originally came up with it for a writing
class that I took a couple of years ago at UCLA. So I present to you the story of
T-Rex, the Cockroach.
Prego means ‘you’re welcome’ in Italian, but to me, it means spaghetti sauce. Not great sauce but, at Costco, sauce that’s desirable, mainly for the large jar it comes in.
That jar, once empty, has many purposes. I’ve rooted plants in it and used it to store bits and pieces of fiber. It’s become a temporary vase and has been pressed into service as a storage unit for crafts. In an emergency, it’s my sharps container. And one fateful night, it was used to house something very unusual.
Among my assortment of chronic and incurable conditions, I have Crohns disease. That means I’m frequently stuck in the bathroom, sometimes for an hour or more. I keep a full bookshelf for entertainment there. At times, though, the pain associated with my disease is too intense and I’m unable to read. I’ll just look around me, take in my surroundings, and try to think pleasant thoughts.
There was one evening, though, when looking was a mistake. I was filled with horror when, trapped on the pot, I saw a giant cockroach – a bug large enough to climb into and drive away - climbing slowly up the wall in the corner opposite me.
I followed his progress as he ascended to the junction where the corner met the ceiling. Hoping against hope, I willed him to turn and traverse back down. But instead, he continued across the ceiling above, upside down, directly towards the quadrant where I sat.
It was only a matter of time, then, the inevitable happened! T-Rex, as I was to name him, lost his grip and fell to the floor. Thankfully, he landed about twelve inches from my bare feet, and lay there stunned by the fall, but I was trapped! The Crohns was especially active that night and I couldn’t leave my seat.
In a semi-panic, I glanced around me. My eyes fell upon the Prego jar, half full of sharps (Used hypodermic needles). As the roach regained his composure and started walking in my direction, I unscrewed the cap. WHAM! Centrifugal force held the needles in place as I slammed the aperture down over him.
Now that I had him, what to do? I managed to get the cap on the jar without letting T-Rex escape. Then, I installed it on the bookshelf opposite the toilet. Every time I would go into that bathroom, there he sat, looking at me balefully through the walls of his plastic house.
I wondered how long he would live. As days passed, and then a week, Rex seemed to take stock of his situation and made a little hut out of the sharps to live in.
I discussed the situation with friends. There was no way I was opening that jar up, even to gas him, as suggested by some with good intentions. I couldn’t, in good conscious, just throw the Prego jar in the garbage either as it contained not only T-Rex, but used needles.
All the while, T-Rex continued to thrive.
The issue came to a climax the day before my next doctor’s visit. I was responsible for turning my used needles in but didn’t want to show up at the appointment with T-Rex in tow. I called ‘Susie,’ my doctor’s nurse practitioner, and explained the situation. Amazingly, she didn’t panic and she didn’t laugh either. She thoughtfully told me to wait by the phone for instructions.
An hour later, I was in route to Cedars Sinai, there to locate ‘Debbie’, one of the nurses on duty. It seemed that her son was working on a science project, collecting roaches for an insect zoo. T-Rex – due to his size -- was going to be the feature attraction.
I often think about T-Rex in that Prego jar. I heard from Debbie once, to thank me and let me know that all the roaches were doing fine. Her son was a budding entomologist and planned to keep them.
I don’t know what Rex thought but, considering his alternate fate would have been death, I hope that he was grateful for his deliverance. If he were to say thank you, there would be only one appropriate response. “Prego.”
Comments
Lights, Camera, Action!
6/28/07
I have a problem with time management. For somebody who basically "has no life," I
have a lot of people calling me, requesting my time.
Added into that stress is trying to make my jewelry and getting ready to present it
to the public.
I have to make it between phone calls, visits from family and friends,
holding people's hands over the phone, and of course the unremitting and unending doctor's
appointments. (My health is holding it's own right now.)
One of the biggest issues I have with my jewelry is getting good photographs. It's
not as easy as it sounds. Eric gave me a digital camera quite some time ago; you've
seen some the results here on this web site. But imaging small items close up is very
different than the point-and-shoot type of picture taking that I'm used to.
Start with the background. I've been shooting my jewelry on the marble top coffee
table that used to belong to Grandma.
Bad move. The grain is distracting, the stone
itself reflects the flash of my camera. Fine for fun and games, but it
does not look professional, and I'm trying to look like a "real" business.
So I was discussing this issue with Eric, and he started musing about the possibilities.
"There must be some kind of box that you could put your jewelry in that lights up, and does
not cost a fortune. After all, people take pictures of miniatures all the time." And with
that comment, I was off!
A search of the internet found me retailers that sell light boxes for about $1500!
GULP! I can't afford that kind of money! I'm at home on disability with
all sorts of ongoing medical issues. My doctor's bills alone are about to throw me into bankrupcy!
(Yes, I'm intensely interested in seeing Michael Moore's Sicko, even though I'm not particularly
a fan of his.) Let's go to Plan "B."
So I searched the internet some more, and presto, magico, there are lots of make-it-yourself
Light Box instructions just perfect for amateurs. I looked at a number of them, and
settled on the foam core, masking tape, and shop light version. Off to Brick's Art Supplies
and Home Depot, a little assembly time, and I had a light box for $57. More my speed.
With light box in place, I figured that I could now take professional looking pictures.
But not so fast! No matter what color paper I put behind my jewelry, everything came out
yellow. And many of the pictures were out of focus, a result of me holding my camera
by hand while leaning over a big, lit up box, and shooting through a hole in the lid.
While there is probably some kind of tripod on the market with a boom for just this
dilema, I certainly don't have the financial base to buy it. Fixed income, et all.
Eric to the rescue again. He discovered that the yellowing problem is common when
shooting pictures in a light box. In fact, there is a "white adjust" feature on my camera
that is for just this issue. While the pictures are still a little yellow, they're
in an acceptable range of color now.
And then, of course, there's the focusing problem. Easily solved. I laid a couple
of tongue depressors across the hole in the light box, and rested the camera against
them. Voila! In-focus pics!!!!
This left one more thing to be tackled before I was in business. The size of my
pictures have been making this site very difficult to open and navigate through.
Eric found Microsoft Office Picture Manager that took care of that. My HERO! I don't think
there's much difference in the quality of the images. And before anyone asks, no,
I'm not going to go back and size my old pictures down, except for my Weight Loss Journey
which I will get to eventually. Too much work when I have more pressing matters at hand.
Now I have a product page that looks really crumby for lack of design, but
new pictures being added almost daily. I have an idea what I would like the page to
actually look like in the window of my mind, and I'll be working on that in a couple
more days. But at least I'm in "business" now.
Comments
What's for Dinner?
6/27/07
What's for dinner might not be of much interest in the morning hours of my normal
days. But today was different. Not only was Eric coming for our regular Wednesday dinner-at-my-condo
after my therapist appointment, but between the two, I had scheduled a visit to my
Podiatrist. My left foot, the one that was operated on last year, has been
hurting quite a bit lately; enough to garner some notice at my exercise class.
I don't like to inflict my health issues on my friends there so I had been keeping quiet
about it, but it's been very painful for the past several classes... enough so that
I've had a noticible limp and I've been taking my shoes off during toning and ab exercises.
But enough of that.
I woke up early this morning with dinner on my mind. What could I serve that would be
Eric-worthy and still somewhat easy? Something that I could prepare in advance and
just cook when he got here. And something quick? You see, I have jewelry to photograph
and get ready to try and sell. And yesterday I made a light box to do it in. And I am not
one for delayed gratification when it comes to new toys. But more on that tomorrow...
So I thought, BBQ! Vegetables and chicken and "Moondance Marinade" (I also like "Happy Together" Orange-Chili-Garlic Sauce) on the BBQ top Wok!
And I went quickly to work chopping whatever was in my refrigerator. Ratini, mushrooms,
onion, red bell pepper. Water Chestnuts, bok choy, red carrots. And of course the chicken.
Did you know that chicken is really easy to slice down while it's still
partially frozen? I learned that on I-don't-know-which-daytime-how-to-show a couple of
months ago. I have no life; I watch those shows. But I can cube chicken in no time flat!
And so I chopped the dinner and I photographed the jewelry (didn't get very far on it),
and I went to my therapist where we discussed how traumitized I am by what I think may
be a very successful venture. Richard Simmons, on his web site's Message of the Day today
wrote about people who lament "Why Me?" I'm currently also
saying "Why Me?," stressed to the max when I think about the potential of what I am working on,
but also in amazement at how my life has changed in a good way since he got into my brain and made me
lose weight. I was turned lose from therapy at five-of-three (usually it's three or a few minutes
after) to make it to the doctor by three-fifteen.
Back onto the foot. So it's been hurting lately. A lot. A WHOLE lot. And I've
been convinced that I was going to need surgery on it. That's a mixed bag in my estimation.
Nobody likes surgery and I'm no different. But there are some mitigating features. Like
getting to choose the color cast that you get to wear. And the boot. The ugly boot. A
canvas to be bastardized in whatever fashion I should choose because I don't have to
wear it for more than a few weeks and it's big and it's clunky and it's ugly. Last
year's theme was glitter and cheap plastic "rhinestone" stars.
I thought I might bead this year's version.
But it was not to be. When Dr. B- looked at my foot, he pronounced "Neuroma."
"Neuropathy?" I responded. "Neurontin?"
"No. Neuroma." Apparently, that's Podiatrist-talk for pinched-nerve-in-the-foot.
Curable by a shot of Cortisone, maybe Physical Therapy, and time. And so I got my
shot in the foot.
But I feel shortchanged. Dr. B's office does not give prizes for not crying during
shots. (Dr. V's office gives cookies. And if you get cookies at the doctor's office, they
are not junk food. They are a prescription.)And Dr. B did not give me a bandaid with a smiley face or frogs or whatever, either.
Just a plain ol' Bandaid.
And when I was turned loose with another appointment in two
weeks, I felt like I was walking on a stone. The feeling of which, apparently, is
supposed to last "three to four days." So tomorrow night at exercise class, I figure
that I'll be having a hoppin' good time. And since I will not be able to wear my
shoes (I suppose), I will be going to the sock hop. But enough with the bad puns.
I came home and Eric came and helped me with my pictures and we ate dinner. Which
on the BBQ and over Saffron Rice was delicious and required minimal clean up.
And
Then left the gallon of milk that he bought for his kids in my refrigerator so he had to come
back again when I called him and asked him if he "Got Milk?". And now I'm going to finish
up this post and go make more jewelry. Or maybe go to bed. Or make jewelry and then go to bed. I have to decide. I am the decider.
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